People with low self-esteem will often describe how they have a ‘little voice’ in the back of their head, constantly telling them they’re going to fail. Other concepts in CBT are ‘over generalisation’, whereby you assume that because you’ve failed at one task, you will fail at all tasks, and ‘false hypotheses’, where you incorrectly predict that you’re going to fail at your tasks.
Here are CBT techniques to help overcome this self-doubt and combat these problems:
‘Mindfulness’- one of the most commonly used of these is actually borrowed from meditation.
• Find a quiet place and sit down with your eyes closed. Much like in meditation, try to reflect on your inner thoughts. This doesn’t mean that you should attempt to clear your mind; however, instead, try to merely ‘watch’ thoughts as they pass by without engaging in them, merely observing the content of your brains as they might watch clouds passing in the sky. This way, you can identify the kinds of things you are thinking and, in particular, any destructive thoughts they might be having. As you get better at this, you are supposed to do it during the day to day activities and then intervene; spotting the negative and damaging thoughts and seeing them for what they are. Most negative ruminations are illogical, and even if they aren’t, they certainly do more harm than good, so learning to spot them and then put an end to them is a valuable skill. Similarly, to aid in this culture of mindfulness, try to keep diaries of your thoughts and activities – then read them back and see how anything you’ve said or done could be disruptive to your self-image.
Counter negative thoughts with positive ones- utilising ‘positive self-talk’ to reaffirm your worth.
• Here, you should make sure to focus on your good point and remember compliments you may have received in the past. Instead of telling yourself you’re fat constantly, replace this with reminders about your nice eyes or straight teeth. You’d be surprised by how effective this can be.